Empties and Chuckers August 2013

The charger for my laptop died this week and I am currently using Noodles' old school laptop, which is about the size of a matchbox and has a teeny tiny keyboard that my stubby Simpsons fingers are really struggling with. It is also mega slow and has hardly any useful software on it, so I feel like I'm back in 1998.

I don't know why this picture is sideways. I rotated it and saved it on the ancient Paint but it didn't seem to work for some reason. 

Empties:

Palmolive Naturals Ultra Moisture Milk & Shea Butter Shower Milk
This is a staple - it's pretty much in every second empties post. Definite repurchase.

Garnier Body Intensive 7 Days Hydrating Lotion
This is not a particularly interesting body lotion - there's no WOW scent or anything. It does a great job though, and both Noodles and I use it regularly. Definite repurchase.

L'Oreal Revitalift Laser X3
Despite being in a jar, I love this moisturiser. It's rich enough to make me think my wrinkles are going away (they're not really), but light enough that I can use it during the day under makeup. I have some other things to use up first but this will be a definite repurchase. Might wait for a sale though- paying $45ish for a drugstore moisturiser makes me wince.

Chuckers:

MorroccanOil Intense Hydrating Mask
This has been in my shower for a couple of years and I noticed the other day that it was about 6 months past its use by date, so ewwww out it goes. It still smelled and looked okay, but considering long it's been around and it's still about 1/3 full, obviously we are not getting much use out of it. I wouldn't repurchase it - it's okay but nothing amazing.

Nivea In-Shower Rich Body Lotion for very dry skin
I cannot say enough about how much I absolutely hate this stuff. It's greasy, it leaves a gross filmy feel on the skin, it STINKS - it smells like diesel. It's no less cumbersome than putting lotion on after a shower. It's disgusting and stupid and pointless and I don't think I have ever hated anything as much as I hate this shit. I will never, ever repurchase this.

I had a pencil clear out because I found a pencil I don't ever remember even buying and that clued me in that maybe I had too many, which is crazy because I don't even use liners that often.

Out because they're too hard:
Mirenesse Magic Point Eye Highlighter Duet
Lime Lily Waterproof Eye Pencil in Jet
Essence Kajal Pencil in #19 All I Want

Out because they're old:
Milani Easybrow in Natural Taupe

Out because they are crap:
ELF Lip Definer and Shaper in Nude
ELF Eyebrow Lifter and Filler in Ash

Out because they are a colour I'd never wear:
Mirenesse Tight Liner Hydra Gel Eye Liner in Saphire (sic) Blue

Inventory 2012: Eyeliners and Brows

I rarely use eyliners, because I'm lazy and because I just don't seem to have a knack for it. I used to - when I was in my late teens and obsessed with Doris Day and Grace Kelly I was a dab hand with the black liquid liner. These days I just can't seem to get it right. I could probably improve again with practice, but you know... there's TV and Twitter and Cracked.com. It's a busy time, man.

Top to bottom:

• essence kajal pencil #19 All I Want (this is pants, not soft enough)
• Milani Liquif'eye Metallic Eye Liner Pencil #05 Brown
• Rimmel Soft Kohl Kajal Eye Liner Pencil #040 Purple Passion
• Rimmel Soft Kohl Kajal Eye Liner Pencil #061 Jet Black
• Mirenesse Tight Liner Saphire (sic!) Blue
• Bourjois Liner Feutre #11 Noir
• Prestige Total Intensity Eyeliner #07 Fearless Teal
• Prestige Total Intensity Eyeliner #06 Powerful Purple
• NYX Slide On Eyeliner #08 Platinum
• Mirenesse Magic Point Eye Highlighter Duo
• (not pictured) Wet'n'Wild Color Icon Brow and Eye Liner Black (I have 4 of these as they came with the eyeshadows that J from Just Peachy sent me with the Naked 2 Palette)
• (not pictured) Urban Decay 24/7 Glide On Eye Pencil mini Zero (also from J with the Naked 2 palette)

Maybelline Lasting Drama Gel Eyeliner in Charcoal and Aubergine. Jade gave me these, and I've actually been a bit keen to get into them, but I'm holding off until I know I'm going to use them, rather than just open them, poke around a bit and then throw them into a drawer where they will be neglected and dry up and die.

Elf Cream Eyeliner Black. I do use this one occasionally and it's one of Elf's better products. A good cheapie. 

NYX Jumbo Eye Pencils in Yoghurt, Pots & Pans, Slate, French Fries, Milk. I have a bit of a like/hate relationship with these. I think they're totally over-rated (even Milk), but they can be good as a base if they're used properly. They crease like a mofo, which is annoying. They're cheap, which is good. I often use Slate in lieu of eyeliner (hence its size compared to the others).

Clockwise from top left:

• NYX Eyebrow Cake Powder Taupe/Ash
• Silk Naturals Brow Powder Medium Ash
• Silk Naturals Brow Cream Medium Ash
• Silk Naturals Brow Powder Light Brunette
• Milani Easybrow Automatic Pencil Natural Taupe
• NARS Eyebrow Pencil Ipanema
• essence lash and brow gel mascara

Okay, I probably have too many black eyeliners for someone who doesn't wear a lot of eyeliner, but I don't think that's too outlandish a stash, is it? Is it....?

The Good, The Bad and The Ugly

Glossybox has learned very quickly how to get good publicity in the Australian beauty blogging community without actually being worthy of it: give out free stuff. Generally, the positive reviews I've read and seen on YouTube have been from people who have received a free box. Those who paid for it often tell a different story. Not true in all cases, but there's a definite pattern there and it seems to be the modus operandi for businesses trying to get a name for themselves in the beauty world these days. Never mind actually being good at what you do - throw a couple of parties and ply some chicks with champagne and macarons, give them a bag of goodies and sit back and watch the accolades roll in.

After getting the Lust Have It box a couple of times I realised that these monthly box things are essentially junk, so I cancelled it. Seeing everyone's monthly reviews of various boxes hasn't swayed my opinion, so why did I sign up for Glossybox? And more importantly, why did I sign up for Glossybox while watching a video where jodik76 slammed them for their craptacular customer service. What can I say? I'm impulsive. Actually, I looked at their brand list, and it looked pretty impressive. I should have known that it would be less Bobbi Brown, Clinique and Shu Uemura and more Mirenesse and Nivea. Foolish me.

The Good

Value wise, this is a major score - a 30ml bottle of Advanced Night Repair retails here for $105. (Unfortunately, this is the only Estee Lauder serum I don't particularly like, but that's not Glossybox's fault - I fit the profile as someone who would be perfect for this. I can probably swap it with someone for something I'd use). The alternate of this product was a Kosmea Daily Facial Exfoliant. The full size is $39.95 - not exactly a comparable product. And I don't believe that the one sent out was a full size. If I were on the receiving end of that and my mates all got the ANR, I think I'd be a bit pissed off. If they're going to alternate products to 'personalise' the boxes (really? what about me made you think I'd wear blue eyeliner on my tightliner?), they should be of roughly equivalent value. It would have been better to send ANR to old farts like me, and perhaps the Estee Lauder pore-minimising serum or the illuminating one to the younger subscribers.

The Bad

And here we have the TVSN clearance bin. There is no escaping Mirenesse - their tentacles are everywhere. I hate their stuff - it's overpriced junk. And I wasn't even aware Sheer Cover was still around. I thought that had died off 10 years ago when mineral makeup companies exploded on to the scene. A lip gloss in a pot (bleh), and a moisturiser that looks oddly like calamine lotion. As for the Nivea body lotion, seriously? I could buy a bottle of that at my local supermarket for about $5. Not exactly what I'd expect from a box business that throws around words like 'luxury' and 'innovative'.

The Ugly

Now, I don't know about you, but when I think of monthly cosmetic boxes, one thing that definitely does not come to mind is fake tattoos. Perhaps those Chanel ones that were around a couple of years ago for about 5 minutes until everyone got over the cuteness factor and realised how silly they were, but these? I saw them in Angela's review before I had even received my box, and though I was unimpressed with the other stuff, this was enough to make me cancel my subscription immediately. (Oh, and can I tell you how painful it is to leave this mob? They make you click box after box and respond to email confirmations and then click more boxes going are you sure you want to leave? Are you sure? This is what you're missing! Look at more of what you're missing? Are you sure? OH MY GOD GET AWAY FROM ME!)

There's a gap in those tattoos because Noodles decided to channel her inner bogan and get into the Oz Day spirit. And before everyone gets up in arms, it's not that I object to tattoos in general - I have two myself - but come on. If I wanted to shop at The Reject Shop, I'd shop at The Reject Shop. This garbage does not belong in a supposedly classy beauty box.

I don't even want to talk about the vouchers. VOUCHERS ARE NOT SAMPLES.

I'm not overly bothered that I spent $15 on this pile of crap. I've spent $15 on piles of crap many times before. It's the cost of a magazine and a coffee. I should have bought the magazine and the coffee. My final thought is that Glossybox should put less effort into arse-kissing bloggers and more effort into putting together thoughtful, good quality, comparable boxes and working on their customer service (I haven't had any issues, but I've heard a lot of horror stories).

And that's me done with the monthly box fad. Next!